You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. Sarah Vanbuskirk is a writer and editor with 20 years of experience covering parenting, health, wellness, lifestyle, and family-related topics. since infants can also contract the disease. And anyone who wants to get close has to wear a mask. Proper hand hygiene is strongly suggested before holding the baby, so that no outside germs are potentially put on the babys hands, which can wind up in their mouth, advises Dr. Alexander. Another complicating factor is if one grandparent is welcomed and another turned away. Is it true that people should wash their hands before holding a newborn? Will the COVID-19 Vaccine Be Safe for Babies? by Babymaker02. Like she was afraid of all the Germs or something. You can decide to let a dear friend or relative hold your baby but ask that strangers or acquaintances simply look at your baby from a distance, suggests Dr. Hasson. Should I cut down on her baths. Additionally, there is the worry that germs that produce colds, flu, COVID-19 or other illnesses or diseases could be spread to your fragile new baby. I feel that its my baby so I have to protect him no matter what others feel. Make sure to support your baby's head. When I got pregnant, MIL made a request to be the first person to hold my son after he's born. Everyone we know understands. We are skipping all of the holiday events this year and pretty much not letting anyone meet the baby for now. Respecting her wish, the author refused to let anyone hold his baby son before the wife recovered from the surgery. Little things like uploading a profile picture make the community a better place. A grandmother-to-be worries that tension with her daughter-in-law will keep her from her grandchild. Sure, it was the middle of the summer and not flu season, but people still had germs! fever of 100.4 or more, they have to go to the hospital & get a Is it no wonder that everyone is breaking down your proverbial door to snag a sec to snuggle with that delicious baby? Ive heard people say it but never truly understood it and now I do. submissions or preferences. 36 hours of labor and a rough delivery later and our baby girl Sophia came exactly one week early this was the hardest thing I have ever gone through in my life and I didnt think I could do it but it was all worth it in the end when they handed me my little bean. This means they need to feed little and often. It's not your baby. I missed my daughter, more than I had ever missed anyone and she was only a few feet away from me. A newborns immune system is its strongest in that first week. So we did it. and indemnify Journal Media in relation to such content and their ability to make such content, By Sarah Vanbuskirk While we both wanted to do nothing else besides hold her and gaze at her, we also couldnt wait to show her off. Updated: June 3, 2021. I've never understood why people think they are entitle, I think new moms are overly paranoid. Also, know that there often are compromises to be made that can make everyone happy. Sorry, I registered just so I could ask this question and get feedback. Smiling grannies and grubby preschoolers alike, they lurch toward your defenseless. Sometimes maternal grandparents have more access to a new baby than paternal grandparents, but it can be just the opposite. What most new parents need is reassurance that they are doing the right thing, and that is something that grandparents can provide. Grandparents must understand that these decisions aren't something that parents are doing to the grandparents. And your baby might need more sleep than you think. However, since babies aren't fully vaccinated until after age 1, you'll also want to be extra vigilant to keep your baby from being exposed to germs, says Dr. Hasson. Newborns are so delicate, and parents often wonder when is the right time to allow visitors to hold their baby. The days that followed were a whirlwind. But just on the father/husband side, the mothers parents arrive today. And if our parents would like to continue to clean and make us dinner, hey, I wouldnt say no. At no time do they replace the diagnosis, advice, or treatment . You also acknowledge that owing to the limited nature of communication possible on But at the same time, shes totally worth it. However, newborns do not have a very developed immune system, so it is wise for parents to be careful of how many people touch their little one. While theres no hard and fast rule on how long your Grandma Suzie should stay at your home to see the baby, you should try to keep visits short and sweet. Come over to the Jan/Feb boards and you can see numerous parents of babies who were taken to the ER and admitted to the NICU because they got RSV in their first two months. Celebrating the birth of your baby with loved ones is a special moment for all new moms. Can definitely confirm that everything everyone says about the first few days of being a parent is true. I appreciated the messages of support, but I was hormonal, exhausted, and didnt feel like myself at all. Sometimes parents who restricted visitors with a first child are completely fine with visitors for subsequent births, especially since there is an older sibling to be cared for. And don't be afraid to speak up if someone crosses a boundary that you're not comfortable with, says Dr. Hasson. Dec 13, 2016 at 3:17 PM. At a certain point, I wasnt just feeling overwhelmed; I was also starting to feel anxious. Why would parents do this to grandparents? Required fields are marked *. Respond to crying. I have never been so overwhelmed and terrified but also full of love at the same time. It's best to ask your toddler, for example, to sit next to you and place your baby on his lap. Irish sport images provided by Inpho Photography Scientists suspect that lack of bonding in human babies can cause similar problems. Especially in the winter season, avoid contact with a lot of people, as this is when more viruses are likely to be circulating, Dr. Ahmed adds. Feed your newborn on cue. We restricted visits initially. Or you can just say that you want to have time with him as his mommy and wish to be the only person to hold him until you are comfortable. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. By Susan Adcox Get them to sit down on a chair and carefully place your baby in their arms. If you are lucky enough to have the chance to visit and bond with your newborn grandchild, try not to overlook the needs of the parents. Mariana Sifrit contracted viral meningitis . Keep the circle of people who you allow to handle your baby small to reduce the chance of accidents and exposure to infections. ), although I still understand how a new mom might not be ok with doing that. Ive also never felt the love that I feel for Sophia. At the same time, we need to think about the risk of denying things that are important to us or are necessary, such as not holding a newborn grandchild for the first time or not receiving the family support new parents might need during the postpartum period. Parenting.Firstcry.com accepts no liability for any errors, omissions or misrepresentations. I Wish I Had Told People NOT to Come Meet My Newborn by Jessica Booth November 11, 2019 at 11:00am AM EST Julia Lazebnaya/Shutterstock. Definitely have people wash their hands or use alcohol sanitizer prior to holding babies. The mother may desire privacy as she tries to establish breastfeeding. It's something that they are doing for the newborn and for themselves. 2010-2023 Parenting.FirstCry.com. Baby wants to hold my hand to sleep. Keep a hand under your newborn's head to make sure it's supported. Want to win a copy of psychotherapist Philippa Perrys new book, The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read? And she would like to continue creating content on health and lifestyle. "For those that want to give baby kisses, the feet and tummy kisses are safest.". Make a polite post on either Facebook or Instagram letting people know the few guidelines you would like them to follow when they visit you. Here are some other reasons why parents may request that grandparents not visit the hospital: It's important to remember that new mothers are usually sent home after 48 hours. Learn more about what health and safety considerations to take when deciding who gets to touch or hold your baby and when; and how to communicate expectations to extended family members, friends, neighbors, and strangers. Even if friends, family, and neighbors are all vying to be the first to love on your newborn, youre going to have to hold them off for a while, Dr. William Schaffner, MD, an infectious disease expert and Professor of Preventive Medicine in the Department of Health Policy as well as Professor of Medicine in the Division of Infectious Diseases at the Vanderbilt University School of Medicine, Nashville, TN, tells Romper. Hip Hold. Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows. Many times when I wanted to take her back people would tell me "but she's not crying." A baby crying is the last sign they give you to let you know they're in distress, uncomfortable or hungry. In their first two months, newborns are at the highest risk of infection, warns Dr. Hasson. i wouldn't take it personally. Another factor is that many mothers have jobs and thus a limited amount of time to stay home with their newborn. She wanted to be in the delivery room with me but I refused to let her, my husband said he'd keep her out of the room under the condition that she be the 1st person to hold the baby. Journal Media does not control and is not responsible for user created content, posts, comments, To snuggle skin to skin, eye-to-eye, face-to-face, breathing in his sweet new baby smell while he breathes . Try rocking or holding your newborn against you, skin on skin. Otherwise, outdoor visits, weather permitting, are a much safer alternative to indoor . A major concern is a potential infection (like pertussis) that can be passed onto your infant, Dr. Schaffner explains. They are creating a protected period for forming a family unit. 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