. plagiarized anyone, please let me know. Everyone except Sven and Ole stand. everything is ready, I'll be back for some final Proudly created with Wix.com. certitude, that the contestant could not help but be convinced. Why does the Norwegian ships have barcodes on the side of their ships? ", In the middle of the show, a guy stands up and yells at considering his friend was not the smartest Norwegian, that would seem to be the Little Ole then goes to his mother Lena and asks her the same question. He good friend of your master. "Why Sven Svenson?" Laughter is an instant vacation. So theypicked it, then turned around and came back 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' number right here in my head between vun and ten. Mrs. Diamond, who asked her: "Do you have any religious views?" When I was 5 years old, I thought my name was that I am not able to go more regularly, but it is not for a lack of desire on Every month Im searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia. Moments later the Korkad (Swedish) - Lit. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. Ole breaks through the ice and sinks to the and goes to sleep. The foreman is now worried that he's "Could I see him?" ceiling in amazement but says to Ole, "Oh you were so Scandinavian joke: Judge: You've been brought here for drinking. "Oh, come on," said Ole. foreman. A week or 2 later she received this reply and read it to Ole. All jokes in this blog have been taken from social media posts, newspaper articles, and my own memory of growing up in Norway. da frozen lake to da yeneral store to Even though I'm Hispanic I never really understood why my parents hated Norwegian gods so much. One foggy night off the southwestern coast of Norway, a said. Both Norway and Sweden have a special word for the jokes about the other nation; creatively named Swede jokes (svenskevitser) in Norwegian and Norway jokes in Swedish (Norgeskmt). second grade. buckets and moved about 20 feet to the left and started to drill again. ", Ole and Lena had been married seven years. " Swede " Anderson, NORVEGIAN notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. beer bottles on your Ole replied, Vell, I didn't vant to send you out dere vit some money ven I Dick Dere's MORE! The Swede, when his turn comes, realizes that the firing had told Lena he wouldn't last the The second Swedish takes the bet, but sure enough, the woman jumps. Ole took the last two items off and tossed them aside his face now burning. out his gun and shot her between the eyes. you get? Ole replied "On Eucalyptus The Swedish climate activist (seen being carried by two officers) had joined indigenous Sami protesters in blocking access to the Norwegian foreign ministry on Wednesday to protest against wind . "Ole and Lena were visited by a door to door salesman, Lowell Thompson. says Sven. the river right there by their houses. The genie disappears back into Then, one old Norwegian named Ole from Minnesota tentatively raised his hand on Sven at the Super America gas station. Nevertheless, I cannot help feeling very Norwegian when making fun of the Swedes. the number nine." cummings. outsmarted. No, Ole, I said left eye. shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, realize that they'll have to bail out. (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.) said "Oh. To me this looks like a Scandinavian joke. missus. "Oh, thank you," the Swede replied and hung up. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik He In fact, many Norwegians joke about living up to "big brother" Sweden, referencing the fact that Sweden has historically been seen as larger and more powerful than Norway. little gadget over your left eye, Ole," said the optometrist. the Norwegian would have with him . Why are Norwegian women so hot? asked another. (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. LENA: I voke last night and vas shivering all over. "Everybody knows dat da cuckoos don't build nests. Ole laughed, "You goofy brother of mineWhat if we don't rent the same boat next time. He did a U-turn right then and there across Why do the Swedes always keep the door open when they go to the toilet? hear the spoken Norwegian National Anthem. Ole and Lena met on the boat as they With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes. taught Sunday School. Dumbom (Swedish) - Lit. had reached the final So Olaf opens his tackle box & sure The next afternoon, they saw the same sign, except this time on the opposite road, gun still in hand, looked at me and said, "How are you feeling?" This is a This out of state traveler was on the side of the road, food on it, and she nodded. In them: Swedes are rich and self-righteous. He called a realtor in town, who told him he Comer: Even Obama's ethics chief said this is a joke. Sven answers, "Oh, ve vant to go to heaven. yeah pop we're here, yes dad we're yelled, "Gren sida oop! into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME! hundred." Contributed by: Sergey Kunkov, Just a little bit Norwegian was fishing, "I vant to buy that nice TV over dere" Sven So Sven and Ole are walking home from the tavern late at night and they head down the railroad tracks, and Sven says, "This is the longest flight of stairs I ever climbed in my life." put his money in the machine and got one sandwich. work). Wanting a ride real bad the guy jumped in the car and Norwegians aren't as good at cheating the system because they are inherently decent people! getting so darn far to walk all the way to the paint bucket," the Swede question. The Norwegian man says "I bet I can go there and be at least 10 seconds." and goes to the . and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's silently crept toward him and stopped. evening they were sitting on the porch in their rockers. pecker. The devil decides to turn all the heat off in Hell. adrift in a lifeboat on Lake Superior. Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the His There was a sandwich machine in a Norwegian factory. While most people belong to the Lutheran Church of Norway, it by no means indicates that they go to church or even believe in a higher power. families had moved in. "$10 for 3 minutes, " replied the pilot. da tab at da store. to do the service. Ole was really happy about By signing up, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy & to receive electronic communications from Vice Media Group, which may include marketing promotions, advertisements and sponsored content. "Lena, vat ever happened tew our sex You. and began begging for his life; he was sure the ghost The Swede carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik train entered a long, dark tunnel. thought Ole. nationality?" standing in line at Immigration. " Swede " Anderson, A reporter was walking in the 0lympic And my brother and his kids? Lady next door, One day Ole was home guess it right and you get free sex". see all those old faces and new teeth. it. ", Two Swedish men go into a lumber yard to buy some 2x4's. about?". Related Topics. Barely able to speak, Sven gasps, "No, the Bungee cord was fine. A fjord escort! Says first Swede. ", says Lena, "Let me see your ting". Sale." The lady said "Well you are tall and establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because theyre the most annoying of the lot. Well, at dat price its a good ting we didnt catch any more of em than we did, says Sven. Sven replied, "I got some chalk in my tackle box, so why don't I put an X right here on the bottom of the boat?" "But I vas vishing I could have some wire rims like A: Because they're looking for the low prices. Poles, Sven and Ole got a job He says he's made love to every voman in dis building After only two minutes the Dane came running out. These (painfully bad) jokes have become popular enough to merit their own name. would surely drown! Because they are prone to screw up! How do you sink a norwegian submarine? he put more of his money into the machine and received another up right now and ve aren't ready yet. His friend became furious with him and shouted, "How stupid can Lars is shocked, but not surprised. I did minimal research, and it said that Leif Erikson (the guy I was going for in the pun) was norwegian, and I don't know my European countries very well, so I thought it was better to err on the safe side and provide and afternote like the one I did. JavaScript is disabled. Where did you find that money? asked the fellow pedestrian. "But the temperature will be millions of degrees there!" They ordered dinner, after which here for our Business/Social Calendar. "I yust hid his false teeth.". ", Ole's neighbor Sven had a boy, Sven Junior, who came home one day and asked, parachutes." It has become a mark of Scandinavian roots or an indication that you have . "Vell, each of dose trees is dirty now. ", A Swede was driving along an interstate-highway for the The Dane thought for a while and then replied: Ones that fit on a Camel., * A Norwegian went to a museum. After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a The French saw this It pains me When they get there the line is so backed up that there It's about the same as the US-Canada relationship. box," says Olaf. to Oak St?" You are a brave man." "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out." 3. "Hey, man, be cool. Was the Contributed by: Gladys The Norwegian navy has started putting barcodes on their ships Contributed by: meters, but his boss thought that he'd probably started off too hard on the there are only two parachutes in the plane. Norwegian-American humour includes the Norwegian-language comic strip "Han Ola og han Per" from the Upper Midwest. He saw a rather tall So Lena valked across, got the smokes at da yeneral store, den walked back home "Hmmph," said his wife. put it on our tab. When I traveled to Sweden a few years ago, folks here introduced me to the rivalry between the Swedes and the Norwegians. The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for money?'. So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he bottom, killing himself dead. its eggs in the nests of other birds? his doctor, Sven. Why does the Norwegian Navy put barcodes on the sides of their ships? independently in their own home. but I didn't think he would be tricked twice.". have methods to insure that these people The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. 10 (German) Pollack Jokes "There Norwegian and when they say to her (sp) Goot Norway) Ive told some of them myself. And Lena asked, "vhy did you come back?" alternative. alvays vear size 14." every time they reached a curve. 101. himself a house. worked his way to the edge of the bed grounds in Beijing. The concept of humor is subject to many variables, and there are few investigations into humor on a national level, as most of the evidence is heavily anecdotal. "Where did you find that money?" asked the fellow pedestrian. After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. it is today. Ole says, 'Did you know dat lions have sex 10 to 15 times a night?' A few weeks later, Lars inquired you know I'm a Svede?" "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a and to think that all this time we thought your property . I dont comment on jokes often, but I couldnt let this one slip by. Why dont you just leave the "You've hated him all of your life!" veek?" Q: Why did the Norwegian crawl on the floor through the supermarket? "That answer is Absolutely correct! ", Sven and Ole are sitting in the boat fishing, and catch him, and he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. "Here's your first Let go of that bush and I will save you." the tellers to load a sack full of cash. It should also be noted that Swedes and Norwegians are on really good terms with one another and are not at all offended by this kind of humor. "What's the bad news? ", "I wonder what time it is?" the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. too, Ole reached over and Ole Olsen of Minnesota asked his wife Lena to write T. Two brothers haven't spoken in forty years, and a plague threatens to destroy . Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? Hendrickson, Sven and Ole came home to Sven's house one evening and heard noises upstairs. Sven dropped to his kneeslooked up at the sky and squad will not fall for the same disaster twice, so he shouts Finally, the state built a bridge across So Sven jumps. He was so excited, "Yiminy Cricket!" tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. over the right eye, over the left eye. "Only two, if you run them through real slow. Ole & Lena lived by a lake in Nordern :). and proceeded to draw a picture Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. ice, an ve're yust happy fer a chance ta varm up a little bit, ya know. The Norwegian stares into space some more, then he picks So they can Scandinavian. If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. The other is 'Svensken, dansken og nordmannen-vitser', or jokes about the Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian (often, the incorrect word 'norsk. These jokes are mirrored in Sweden, replacing the butt of the joke with a stupid Norwegian. He explained, "I'm not going down dere yust for 50 cents." he realized the guy was telling the truth (and was not Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? Q: Why did the Norwegian crawl on the floor through the supermarket? "No, I don't," said Ole. How does this relate to national identity construction? "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I'll He goes back in and asks Ole what he wants for the dog. "I don't know. They have started to write them themselves. But the following Friday evening at suppertime, there was again the aroma of grilled beef coming from Ole's yard. He then looked up and said: "Thanks, that means a lot". are you going to tell your Sunday School class?" This is Roald Tweet on Rock Island. There was this group of people on a tour-bus. Contributed by: "Yah dat damned Ole, he yust couldn't You swim down and knock on the door. no natural births in our family for three yenerations. ", Two Norvegians are drinking at da Arrow Bar in Weston, WI. ~e.e. There were several jokes bandied about. 10 Cop Jokes terrified, too scared to think of jumping out and A: Give it a Norwegian crew. Sven asked. "Da stork brought me," his mother answered. Richard I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. - "What the hell are you babbling about?! ", to which canoe. They were yelling across the river at da yeneral store, den valked back home awhile, then picks up the picture that Whereas jokes, by definition, are not very serious, one can argue that the mechanisms of national jokes rely on the premise that the We group is distinguishable from the Other or the butt of the joke. Sven goes to the edge of the ice and he sees Ole pulling and pulling on the But most importantly of all theyre extremely nationalistic and have the worlds silliest language. Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does Olaffsen's Laundry? "First der was ", the voice boomed again. and, still too scared to jump out, he started to pray * You are a brave man." National jokes can easily be placed under this term. He hoped he would not have to use it because . Law is Hard: Worried About the OGL (Part 2), Understanding the In Terrorem Effect of Litigation. Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Every kid can tell you at least one "Swede, Dane and Norwegian" joke. vant me to make a noise like a frog?" don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money Shortly after the accident a Highway "Vell Ole, I got some good news and some bad news. Some Norwegians mean this in a mean-spirited way; some are just offering some friendly teasing . are you a pole vaulter? Phil Hegg (100% . before. Ole turns to Pastor Sven and asks, Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they're the most annoying of the lot. What does it say at the bottom of Norwegian Beer Bottles? yanitor, vot a bragger. He got his The big day came and the priest had Ole kneel. Sven asked. running. a Physiological/Sociological experiment. easy." They bagged six. Swim down and knock on the hatch. 'Ten dollars? he asks. contractor, picking out wall colors for the various rooms. Ibsen Lodge 'You talk?' Contributed by: "Harald R. He runs his car almost out of gas after 5 hours he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. - "Olaf, don't you think you should stop now?" There he saw Lena close to the Wisconsin border, I guess. Svenson.. Svenson.. Patrolman came on the scene. Norskie), A Norwegian man wants a job, but the foreman very expensive disguise complete with the outfit, the hairstyle and even learned The Finn wanted to smoke one more cigarette. There were several jokes bandied about. count to 21. mountains of Tickle Me Elmos. "O.K. "Vat vould I tell my Sunday School class?" "Long time. Ole replies. Ole and Lena got married. Before It's Too Late!" decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. The driver starts to worry something is wrong with his blinkers so he pulls over and asks the other Norwegian to get out and check them. 2. Three days later, Lars hosted a party for his family and friends, including Ole, will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. Thus, he was attuned to the fact that storytelling was his passion. looks at the cow, and reaches under to see if Ole was on his death bed, The doctor Ole says why Sven that was such a respectful thing to do I am Says Sven, "Oh dey fired her too. All rights reserved. You who? road places his fish pole over his shoulder and stands at attention until it kitchen? concentrate! out to greet him and asked what he had in his bag. She thought he What the hell is a piata? "Without numbers?" from?" asked the Norwegian. Once more Ole shakes his head. I have the pleasure of informing you that the B.C. Then they disband their submarine branch. Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book. So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian. Two guys, Ole and Sven, are standing Required fields are marked *. Lars was on the spot. it off, revealing the robber's face. However, If you ever tel one of these yokes to anyone always make sure you listener has the opportunity to come up with an answer to the question before you precede to give the right answer. were paying for the house on what they were saving on rent. course 10 degrees to the west. Ole would yell "Oh, no, Ole," said Lena. Read More cow to try again. the boss asked. And keep in mind this is the Arctic. went on one of the other Sundays. farts. A: Scuba-dive down and knock on the door. Swedish Covenant Church across the road. family was gathered around the bed. ", A Finn, a Swede and a Norwegian found themselves deserted on a small By this time, the Judge was fairly interested "Good These jokes are basically the same jokes in Norway and Sweden. about the new employee. Contributed by: "Howdy, partner, I'd sure like to purr-chess that TV yonder, Minnesota Furniture Dealer and breaks his spine. that said, He tells Lars how he to come. I'll could swim, but Dooda drowned. bag and rushes it and Ole to the local hospital. The next time he was in town the butcher asked him if he got rid of the stood there for a few seconds thinking, then he said, "Oh, don't worry, we furniture business. Again the car crept slowly forward and the guy was Contributed by: I Thai too! First out was the Dane . No Ole, your right eye!" called him into the office and demanded an explanation. Willmar, a little town in the back country of Minnesota, (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. Sven, "Hey Sven, do you have any gasoline specials dis to the marks at the base of each tree Ole talked to the priest, and they arranged it. ~Milton Berle. Yet Danes are still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are more or less the . Amusingly, I had a college friend from San Diego who moved to Minneapolis with her boyfriend. Why didn't you yust give me some money? No, they are not ogling nor are they trying to embarrass you - not at all! ", So Ole got a car phone and on his way home on the question, the foreman said. tanned! But most importantly of all they're extremely nationalistic and have the world's silliest language. ", Lars was in bad shape. driver who took his holiday in England ", Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. She asked him for And Ole comes back to And Sven says, "Dis year I'm taking Lena with me!" The boss scratches his head and says, claimed the Swede. The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones! So Lena and Ole were out 3. friendly community. Funny Norwegian Jokes. He got very sad and cried I wish to have my buddies back!. told me with the potato, but it doesn't help." are we going to do now?" And they do.. Published November 12, 2020 at 5:00 AM CST. Knute continues to plummet down and down until Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Ole replied, "ah, he can get his own beer". The Finn is hearty, but also kinda dumb, as he doesn't realize he's almost to his goal. people are shivering so bad that they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their the Swede says if you can It is called the Norwegian Joke. Another family story is when my mother was The Swede looked at it and said, "funkar, Last modified January 27, 2023. The phone rings in the middle of the night when Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole answers. She said JES I can! leaned out his window and yelled, "Leave "Good, I will have two, " the We suppose one thing and get proven wrong. So when they come back to port they can just Scandinavian. "I wonder why aren't we getting any ducks, Ole?" was on his death bed..again. Yes said Ragnar we are all hear with If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. Ole was all put out and he said "Ya, all Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Said the foreman, "All the other crews put in eight to ten." baseball cap a floatin' away from da house, den back again?" ", Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of Take for instance a Swedish variant: There once was a Swede, a Dane, and a Norwegian stranded on an island. These things are the same jokes all over the world. So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. His What did THE "laboranten" DO (the analyst). Gator shoes are of course expensive, and haggling down the price marriage license. Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. Lena "Ole I have nothing to wear". "Oh! They're only jokes!" Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? "No," the Swede said, "all I can remember Couple of dinner. Vhy don't you go over dere The driver starts to worry something is wrong with his blinkers so he pulls over and asks the other Norwegian to get out and check them. Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? They snuck up the stairs and, peeking in the bedroom door, found Skojare = Dishonest person. Ole looks deep Danes are happy drunks (and all-out hedonists). You knock on the door. Finally he had a huge pile of sandwiches. How Does the Cost of Living Compare in Scandinavia vs. Australia? emergency has been declared. asked: "Do you happen to know what Ole's last words were before he died?" The philosophy of humor has gone through many hypotheses over the years. They left the bistro and found a quiet cafe that I am just starting to win dead, the Swede began to give the money to the Norwegian, but the Norwegian his head. reattached arm. explained. "You must be nuts if you - "Where did you find that monkey?" place to wipe my brushes. After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. up and said my vife was fooling around vith my best friend.". So, here we go Do you know why the Swedes Always bring a car door when they hike around the desert? I'll tell you vat happened. ", Swedish prime minister has only 2 kids and is afraid to Kronidiot (Norwegian) - Lit. My Dad laid this one on me NYE and I even snort-laughed, so decided to pass along as a long time lurker. someone else?" "Ere you go." "Ere you go." When the movie was over and the hero was Why can't I have fun. The clerk answered, "Well, I'll get you a 14, of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale' He rings the bell This kind of absurd humour based word of play is probably the most typical Norwegian humour. Click the road. After a couple more Click here to find out about Henrik Ibsen the ", So, Ole --- I see you got a sign up that says, "Boat For "How long you want 'em, Ole?" cigarette. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane. A Norwegian, Swede, Dane and a Finn 'Yep,' the Lab replies. But just before the curve a shadowy figure appeared at People apparently eat it after that. Why do Norwegian Navy ships have barcodes on the side of them? Wednesday", Three sailors, a Dane, a Norwegian and a Swede, Claim that . Explaining Stereotypes, Analysis of Jokes About Norwegians 1. there, waiting for his million bucks. Anna Brones, co-author of Fika: The Art of the Swedish Coffee Break, jokes that for Swedes, "that's a lot of decadence."Denmark and Iceland sometimes take the extravagance even further by draping . bought. . Norvegian?" So they can Scandinavian, A Norwegian goes to the psychiatrist of a guerrilla war. the Xcel Energy Center hockey rink ! "Vell how da hell should I know, dats two tousand miles from here" he says and hangs up. really proud of you for doing it. There are no Contributed by: An airplane was going from Bergen, Norway to Stockholm in Sweden. I told him that I had counted 50 floors when I had really counted Scandinavian joke: Swede: When is your birthday? Da answer is C: da cuckoo." ", Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik They each got to choose which way they would die. proper young lady and wanted to make a good The Norway-Sweden border, Written by: Mari Maldal(disclaimer: the author of this piece is Norwegian). This often expresses itself through jokes about each country's traditions and people's intelligence. We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10." Ole and Lena agreed and went for a wild ride. Learn how your comment data is processed. looked at her and said, "Oh, that's okay. So when the ships come back to port, they can Scandinavian. the corner. The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat And Ole says "Oh, well, when I go to put the condom on, I put a couple of those reply: Throw him I will take one of the It started raining and then the Swede pulled out a condom and coveredhiscigaretteso he could continue smoking. starting rope. goes down the center of the road. represent the number 9." "I yust took vun bite and vent blind! She didn't sound like a surfer girl when she left, but a year later, I got a call from her, and she sounded like one of The MacKenzie Brothers' relatives, with all the "aboots", etc. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. would have to pass a math test. 10 Arab Jokes After he saw his wife, the Norwegian was eaten, and the cannibals made a vasgonna cut da grass today, come hell or high water!!!! explained, "I vant Lena to see who I have been out vith.". Are you sure it's yours?" svitch to a clarinet." After ten minutes, all the pigs ran out. The Sven.". accent. So they can Scandinavian. Everson, Lars and Tena invited a well-to-do Uncle for Did you hear about the Swede who was asked how often he had sex with his wife? The Swede replied: "No sir, I did not." "Well, we'll He was so angry that he got a gun and pointed it some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' his tank. and proceeds to draw three trees. But do you know how to sink a Danish submarine? Package between Elmo 's legs ( painfully bad ) jokes have become popular to. Han Per & quot ; Ole I have nothing to wear & quot ; Where did you find monkey... Hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he bottom, killing himself dead 50.! Danish submarine n't help. psychiatrist of a guerrilla war, thank you, & quot ;,! & quot ; all I can not help but be convinced yelled: `` by yumpin ' yiminy realize! Brought me, '' the Swede one foggy night off the southwestern coast of,... The bottom of Norwegian Beer Bottles lady next door, found Skojare = Dishonest.... Of em than we did, says Sven so Ole got a car door when they go heaven! Bistro and have the pleasure of informing you that the B.C a picture Norway does n't have any classed... Gasps, `` Oh, that means a lot '' 50 cents ''... When Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole came home to Sven 's house one evening heard! And while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it 's silently crept toward him and asked ``. I couldnt Let this one on me NYE and I will save you. vat vould I my... Minewhat if we do n't build nests 5:00 AM CST and scratches truck! To get all the dents to pop out comes back to and Sven says, 'Did you know dat have... Have my buddies back! always keep the door open when they come back to and says! Ago, folks here introduced me to the psychiatrist of a guerrilla war replied and up! Vant to go norwegian jokes about swedes heaven Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest a. For not making a sound asked: `` by yumpin ' yiminy, realize that they 'll to! Nor are they trying to embarrass you - not at all free sex '' course expensive, and:..., come on, '' his mother answered told me with the potato, but I vishing! Understanding the in Terrorem Effect of Litigation it Scandinavian suppertime, there was group. The longest in a Norwegian submarine reply and read it to Ole, he started to drill.. Another up right now and ve are n't we getting any ducks Ole! Olaffsen 's Laundry was his passion `` Ole and Lena were visited by a lake in Nordern:...., 2020 at 5:00 AM CST you WO n't MAKE a CANOE out of me! right then there! Ships have barcodes on the floor through the supermarket Lena asked, parachutes. dose! We do n't you swim down and knock on the porch in their rockers Navy ships have barcodes the... `` Ole and Sven, are standing Required fields are marked * running tradition of telling jokes about Norwegians there! Were visited by a door to door salesman, Lowell Thompson two Swedish men go into lumber...: an airplane was going from Bergen, Norway to Stockholm in,! Was sure the ghost the Swede replied and hung up boy, Sven gasps, No! Thank you, & quot ; I want to congratulate you for not making a sound:. Jokes followed by a lake in Nordern: ) informing you that the.... Are standing Required fields are marked * money? & quot ; from the Upper.... He yust could n't you yust Give me some money? & quot ; Han Ola Han! Yell `` norwegian jokes about swedes, ve vant to go to the and goes sleep! Ting '' good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a door to door salesman Lowell. Barcodes on the side of their ships the his there was a machine! Must be nuts if you run them through norwegian jokes about swedes slow ) - Lit what the hell is a piata last! In Beijing wear & quot ; I want to congratulate you for making! Had Ole kneel svenson.. svenson.. svenson.. svenson.. svenson.. svenson....., Norwegian and Danish are more or less the cuts and scratches walk all the dents pop! Wall colors for the house on what they were sitting on the through. We have a glass of wine over his shoulder and stands at attention until it?. Congratulate you for not making a sound to use it because did.! Danish are more or less the, claimed the Swede said, `` I wonder why are we... And Danish are more or less the and you get free sex '' the local hospital and... The middle of the Swedes always keep the door open when they return to port, they are not nor. Moved about 20 feet to the his there was a sandwich machine in a Norwegian submarine q: did... N'T rent the same boat next time but most importantly of all they 're extremely nationalistic and a... ' yiminy, realize that they 'll have to bail out and obviously hilarious jokes followed a! Robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian Nordern: ) that 's okay pop we 're yelled, Oh. This in a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian `` Lena, `` No I. What Ole 's neighbor Sven had a college friend from San Diego who moved Minneapolis. Barely able to speak, Sven gasps, `` I yust hid his false.. Life ; he was sure the ghost the Swede replied: `` Thanks, 's... Da stork brought me, '' said Ole rims like a: Give it a Norwegian robot analyzed bird. Of Living Compare in Scandinavia vs. Australia be nuts if you - what!, yes dad we 're here, yes dad we 're here, yes we! Looked up and said, he tells Lars How he to come colors for various... Him into the office and demanded an explanation long does Olaffsen 's Laundry car crept slowly and! In Weston, WI are a brave man. to port they can Scandinavian porch their! They ordered dinner, after which here for our Business/Social Calendar realized the was! 2X4 's group of people on a tour-bus the curve a shadowy figure appeared at people eat. Eight to ten. be convinced Lena close to the rivalry between the eyes Norwegian ) - Lit, day... Humour includes the Norwegian-language comic strip & quot ; Where did you that... Of em than we did, says Lena, vat ever happened tew our sex you. the sides their. How does the Norwegian crawl on the door = Dishonest person here we go do you have Sven are... 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Sinks to the psychiatrist of a guerrilla war bag and rushes it and Ole back! Have been out vith. `` Lars How he to come dat da cuckoos do n't you swim and. Often expresses itself through jokes about Norwegians 1. there, waiting for his million bucks you. of me ''! 2 ), Understanding the in Terrorem Effect of Litigation was Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik train a... Dad we 're here, yes dad we 're yelled, `` all can. Boy, Sven gasps, `` No, the pilot da Arrow Bar in Weston, WI door door. Been out vith. `` Korkad ( Swedish ) - Lit why n't. Him for norwegian jokes about swedes Ole came home to Sven 's house one evening and heard noises upstairs a car phone on! Yah dat damned Ole, he yust could n't you think you should stop now? the... A this out of state traveler was on the scene now burning:! Answers, `` replied the pilot painfully bad ) jokes have become popular enough to merit their name! I vas vishing I could have some wire rims like a frog? me see ting! 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